A year ago, I wrote about the thirteen things I learned from 2013. While I was writing that, I didn't only think of the year that passed, but also the year that will follow. I was nervous, to say the least. In due time, I was leaving the country for four months to live and study in Europe, then who knows what will happen after that? A full 364 days later, here I am declaring that 2014 may be the best year of my life yet. This year changed me in almost every aspect, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I now present to you my 2014 Year-end Review: The 14 Things I Learned from 2014.
1. Life happens outside your comfort zone.
From January to May 2014, I was studying, living, and touring around Europe. Well...it was amazing, to say the least.
(England)
(France)
(Italy)
(Vatican)
(Czech Republic)
(Switzerland)
(Netherlands)
(Spain)
(Portugal)
(Belgium)
(Luxembourg)
The truth is, it was never really my plan to go through with my Junior Term Abroad. Aside from the fact that it's expensive as hell, I'll be forced to live alone in Nantes, France, a place that was unfamiliar to me. Living alone also meant that I had to learn to do things on my own, such as grocery shopping, doing the laundry, and paying the bills, among others. Take note, only a handful of people know how to speak English in Nantes. For my first few weeks in Nantes, I had to get by with my basic French , while always making sure I had my French dictionary in hand. The language barrier was insane, and if that wasn't hard enough, I was hundreds of miles away from the people I know and love. As I adjusted to my surroundings, however, everything became so much easier. I learned to do my chores without hassle, and I was able to make friends with a lot of people from different countries. The feeling of independence came so easy to me that I decided to travel three countries - Portugal, Belgium, and Luxembourg - in a week by myself, and to tell you the truth, I never felt more alive. If I had not chosen to leave the comforts of home and the company of friends and family, I never would've experienced the life-changing experiences brought by my four month stay in Europe...which brings me to number two.
2. College parties are actually a lot of fun.
Here's a confession: I've only been to two college parties in my life. The first was in Nantes, France during Valentines Day; the second was in Megatent last November. It's no secret that I'm not a party guy. I was never into loud music, large crowds, or booze. For the first three years of my life in college, I chose to stay at home and relax rather than attend a college party, which seems to be a requirement of some sorts for most people. Little did I know how much fun I've been missing.
(With my international bros in Nantes, France)
(With the men of 304 at Madhouse)
Based on the pictures above, I guess it's evident how much I enjoyed those parties. It's fun to be crazy once in a while. One thing's for sure: those parties definitely WON'T be my last.
3. Things happen for a (good) reason.
Of all the ups I've experienced this year, there was a bloody great down. It stuck in my mind for quite some time, and it was hard to stay positive for weeks after that. But that same bad news helped me make a choice in what's probably the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my life. After that, I've never felt happier. It just goes to show that there will always be positives to take away from a negative experience. Indeed, things happen for a reason.
4. The journey can be better than the destination.
Drawing from my memories of my Junior Term Abroad, I discovered that some of the best memories I have are from the times I rode a train, plane, bus, etc. Some of the sights I saw were breathtaking.
(Cinque Terre, Italy)
Whenever I traveled with friends, our conversations almost always revolve around hobbies, life, and travelling. It was eye-opening. I hardly got impatient in commuting, to be honest, and it's all thanks to great company.
Some of my best memories include a severely crowded train ride to Venice (which was the first time I saw snow in years), the 19 hour train ride from Prague to Nantes (including at least six train transfers), and the 13 kilometer walk along the mountains and the sea at night and in the rain in Cinque Terre, Italy (after we got stranded in a tourist spot that closed).
(After the 13km walk)
5. Communication is the key to a strong and stable relationship.
Without a doubt, long distance relationships are tough. You don't get to spend as much time as you want with the one you love, and even in the age of cellphones and instant messaging, it's still hard to talk to each other. Academic requirements also don't help the cause. Communication is the thing that affirms the existence of the relationship, and in the context of a long distance relationship, this is of utmost importance. More than two years into my relationship, I realized that any misunderstanding between couples is always somehow a result of lack of communication. Coincidentally, communication is also the solution to misunderstandings between couples. To the individuals who are in a relationship...if there are any problems or doubts, talk to each other. It's the only way to get through it.
(Staying strong)
6. "Sometimes, all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage."
A friend of mine, who's currently on the verge of making a move to the woman of his dreams, told me this quote. Just imagine if everyone had the same mindset; the possibilities are endless. The best part is, the quote applies to almost every aspect of one's daily life. Thinking of taking a risk? All you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Now I haven't watched "We Bought a Zoo" just yet, but this quote from the movie is the perfect mantra for everyone.
7. The road less traveled is where you'd want to be.
I've always imagined how my life would be ten, twenty, or thirty years from now, and whether or not I'll come to regret the decisions I made (or haven't made). This has made me more cautious on the decisions that I make, even to the point of indecisiveness. But then, I read this comic from Zen Pencils, a website that I discovered earlier this year.
I realized that people keep on saying that they want their lives to be extraordinary, and yet they keep making choices that lead them to the same path that they've been travelling their whole lives. I, for one, won't do the same.
8. The best way to end an argument/potential argument is to be the better man.
Arguments are unavoidable in friendships. As much as you'd want to confront a friend for being a (for the lack of a better word) jackass, the best thing to do is to assess the situation first, keep a level head, and always be the better man. No punching, no screaming, no threats, no insults. You keep quiet and walk away. Take note: you didn't lose the argument, you merely chose to stop talking to someone who's insensitive. Not making a scene makes you the better man.
9. Don't stress yourself out over things you can't control.
This is an idea that I found myself repeating over and over in my mind. It makes a lot of sense, doesn't it? Why waste energy and time stressing over something that wasn't your fault? Even if it serves to be an inconvenience for you, there's no point in allowing it to ruin your day. Some things just happen, and once we learn to accept that, then maybe we'd have more good days than bad ones.
10. It's important to cherish the small things in life.
I had my immersion program in Estero de Paco, an urban poor community in Manila, last December 5 to 7. In the program, we're partnered with foster families who live within the area, live in their house for three days, study the community, and basically live our lives the same way as our foster families live theirs. I was partnered with a lovely couple, whom I called Tatay Nino and Nanay Rizza. They welcomed me with open arms and made me feel at home since Day 1. Here are some pictures of their home and the surrounding areas.
(Estero de Paco)
(Outside the house)
(The house)
(My foster family)
Even though they only have so little, my foster family was truly happy. Living for three days in an urban poor community made me realize how I've taken the small things in life for granted. Rest assured, that won't happen again.
11. "When going out, always dress like you're about to meet the love of your life."
Whether you've already met the love of your life or not, this quote applies. In the past year, I realized how it's important to dress properly, no matter the occasion. I've also realized that the way you dress can also influence the way you feel for the rest of the day. So here's a tip: invest in new shoes and clothes. It may be expensive, but you won't regret it.
12. Everybody changes...and it's okay.
People change all the time. Sometimes, the changes can be so drastic that they're hardly the people you've come to know years before. This is normal. I realized that the best thing to do would be to accept them for who they are and appreciate the friendship that remains.
13. Today's simple photographs will make you happy in the future.
It's amazing how much happiness a photograph can bring. It surprised me how many memories can be brought back by something as simple as a candid photograph from five years ago, a photograph that didn't really matter much back then. From me to you, take photographs as much as possible, even if there's no occasion. You'll love them in the future.
(I still love this photo)
14. You can't live in the past.
I remember being alone in my room in Nantes, looking at old pictures from high school with the Eraserheads' "Minsan" or Oasis' "Champagne Supernova" playing on my laptop. Reminiscing makes me happy, but I found myself missing the good ol' days more and more. For the following few days, the memories from years ago were all that I could think of, and I didn't allow myself to enjoy the present. We can't always be stuck in reverse. There comes a point when we have to move on, live our lives and not think about what could have been. Cherish the memories, but live in the present.
And with that, my 2014 Year-end Review is complete. Merci beaucoup, 2014! You've been wonderful.
